Today's sermon was about being thankful all the time... remembering that there are many who are not as fortunate. Often times we forget and believe that we are entitled to the things we have... when clearly everything is a GIFT from God.
In the storms of our life, God is taking us through the desert, asking us to grow. Often we are shaped during the storm to be more patient, compassionate and thoughtful. It is in these times that God transforms us and softens our hearts. When I look at the things that God has given me, I know that I am truly loved. As humans, we do compare. We always think the grass is greener on the other side... we always hunger for more... but what we have to recognize is that we have enough. God, himself, is enough.
It has been in recent years that I have realized that I really am not ready to be a parent. I know that God has a plan for me and being a parent doesn't mean that I have to be pregnant. God has put many people in my path and I know that God is building me up so that I can be the parent my child deserves. I know that I am selfish and materialistic. It is very apparent that God is fixing this flaw in me.
I know that parenting requires teamwork and my husband and I are sometimes not on the "same" page. So I do see God at work, building us to be stronger and more united. My husband believes that we need a new start and feels that selling our current home will satisfy this tear in his heart. I pray that God will hear our prayer and lead us in the right direction.
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Monday, May 28, 2012
Weekend Away... Changes in Renewing My Mind
This has truly been an eventful weekend... connecting with God and with other Christians was definitely pinnacle. I had felt God coaxing me to register us and I am glad that I listened.
Although I did not meet any new "pew buddies" for 1st service at this retreat, I definitely felt that God had a purpose for us, not just to receive, but to also share and to give. I was reminded that God loves me and that even though Tenth is a huge church, my senior pastor, who I have only had a conversation with no more than 3 times in person over the past 5-6 years, actually knew my name! Wow! I'm actually not really invisible at all..
I knew David Collins would deliver a mind blowing and riveting message. His premise is that we really don't know much of anything. We operate on at most 1% of what God knows and 2% of what we know we don't know. Our behaviours and actions are a result of that 1% knowledge we have... What about the 97% of things we don't know that we don't know? To get to know God fully, we must seek him out and be throw into trusting and having faith in Him... I had heard this part before, but I knew that this was new information to my significant other. The gist of David's message was that to really know God, we must endure hardship. We must suffer. He will take us places where we don't want to go or put us in situations where we don't want to be... yet it is in these very moments that we get to see and learn about the 97% of what God knows, for these are things we could never fathom of on our own.
I was pleasantly surprised that my husband was excited to go on this retreat. I was also comforted that he was moved by David's message and was able to hear God calling out to him. God has been whispering, talking and even yelling at times to remind me that there is a change coming. I don't know if it will be necessarily good or bad, but I do that that the unknown is where He wants us to be. Trust. Faith. Being humble and sincere. Being generous. God asks us to be Christlike... to change from the inside out... to change our attitude, for this is the root of our problems. We are to radiate God's love, not so that others will praise us with "stars", but so that we have a chance for them to see first hand the characteristics of God.
God's first message to me was addressing and confirming all the changes in my life. It was evident to me that God has put changes in place at my school, telling me that I am to stay... I am to drop this "star". I am to stop this perception of me being "drained" of my energy and talents, but rather to open arms and welcome them and ask the God fill me up. I was becoming selfish... for I wanted to leave and strip someone else so that I could be "filled up"... at least that's what I am hearing now...Within the past year, I have gone to Cambodia without my husband on a mission trip allowing both of us to draw closer to God in ways we wouldn't be able to do together. I have connected with more Christians through a small group and my husband's desire for a new change in employment and our financial rut were addressed and now we potentially have an opportunity to move homes... change is eminent...
My husband for the first time was sincere in his desire to pursue adopting a child overseas. Hallelujah! He felt God leading him to be more trusting and admitting that God knows best...
Furthermore I was reminded how lucky I am to have a very compassionate and loving husband. Christlike people attract others... it is very evident that he possesses these Christlike qualities. My husband is really a man who is fairly humble in his walk with Christ. But this weekend, he was bold. He prayed aloud and proud. He shared a part of his dark path and anger and bitterness towards God for denying him a child of his own. This was message that God wanted him to share - not only to soothe his own pain, but to use it to strengthen another couple going through the same reality we are. We are not being denied, we only say this because we only judge from the 1% of God's plan we see. We don't see God's whole picture... we don't see the value and role we are to play.
Nothing that we know is really for certain. We are all (Christians and non-Christians) pearls of great price. We are all loved by our maker and He knows us for He created us out of love and purpose. The question becomes, "Will we seek out our value and use it to honour God?"
In coming home this weekend, we were reminded about how fragile life is and that our time on Earth is finite. My husband's mom had signs of an oncoming heart attack while we were out of town, which she admitted and for which I believe is a result of her being overstressed and anxious. I cannot help but believe Satan had a hand in this. Satan has been revelling on his grip on him until recently and I don't believe in coincidences. My husband's desire to walk along side Christ is a threat... for when push comes to shove, my man is loyal and devoted, who would not want a servant like that?
My husband was distraught when he realized what went "down" while we were connecting with God. He became so emotional at the hospital during his visit with Mom that he started crying, something he rarely does. He began to envision his life without Mom and was thankful that God had preserved her and that she is currently in no serious condition.
But now I am reminded that we need to show and tell others about God's goodness before it really becomes too late. We are to share God's desire for us to be in Heaven with Him and that we are to obey His teachings... especially sharing the Good News with the ones we say we love the most!
Father, I pray that you will continue to work in me to be more generous, loving, sincere, faithful and trusting in you. Help me to remember that when You are with me, Satan doesn't stand a chance...
Although I did not meet any new "pew buddies" for 1st service at this retreat, I definitely felt that God had a purpose for us, not just to receive, but to also share and to give. I was reminded that God loves me and that even though Tenth is a huge church, my senior pastor, who I have only had a conversation with no more than 3 times in person over the past 5-6 years, actually knew my name! Wow! I'm actually not really invisible at all..
I knew David Collins would deliver a mind blowing and riveting message. His premise is that we really don't know much of anything. We operate on at most 1% of what God knows and 2% of what we know we don't know. Our behaviours and actions are a result of that 1% knowledge we have... What about the 97% of things we don't know that we don't know? To get to know God fully, we must seek him out and be throw into trusting and having faith in Him... I had heard this part before, but I knew that this was new information to my significant other. The gist of David's message was that to really know God, we must endure hardship. We must suffer. He will take us places where we don't want to go or put us in situations where we don't want to be... yet it is in these very moments that we get to see and learn about the 97% of what God knows, for these are things we could never fathom of on our own.
I was pleasantly surprised that my husband was excited to go on this retreat. I was also comforted that he was moved by David's message and was able to hear God calling out to him. God has been whispering, talking and even yelling at times to remind me that there is a change coming. I don't know if it will be necessarily good or bad, but I do that that the unknown is where He wants us to be. Trust. Faith. Being humble and sincere. Being generous. God asks us to be Christlike... to change from the inside out... to change our attitude, for this is the root of our problems. We are to radiate God's love, not so that others will praise us with "stars", but so that we have a chance for them to see first hand the characteristics of God.
God's first message to me was addressing and confirming all the changes in my life. It was evident to me that God has put changes in place at my school, telling me that I am to stay... I am to drop this "star". I am to stop this perception of me being "drained" of my energy and talents, but rather to open arms and welcome them and ask the God fill me up. I was becoming selfish... for I wanted to leave and strip someone else so that I could be "filled up"... at least that's what I am hearing now...Within the past year, I have gone to Cambodia without my husband on a mission trip allowing both of us to draw closer to God in ways we wouldn't be able to do together. I have connected with more Christians through a small group and my husband's desire for a new change in employment and our financial rut were addressed and now we potentially have an opportunity to move homes... change is eminent...
My husband for the first time was sincere in his desire to pursue adopting a child overseas. Hallelujah! He felt God leading him to be more trusting and admitting that God knows best...
Furthermore I was reminded how lucky I am to have a very compassionate and loving husband. Christlike people attract others... it is very evident that he possesses these Christlike qualities. My husband is really a man who is fairly humble in his walk with Christ. But this weekend, he was bold. He prayed aloud and proud. He shared a part of his dark path and anger and bitterness towards God for denying him a child of his own. This was message that God wanted him to share - not only to soothe his own pain, but to use it to strengthen another couple going through the same reality we are. We are not being denied, we only say this because we only judge from the 1% of God's plan we see. We don't see God's whole picture... we don't see the value and role we are to play.
Nothing that we know is really for certain. We are all (Christians and non-Christians) pearls of great price. We are all loved by our maker and He knows us for He created us out of love and purpose. The question becomes, "Will we seek out our value and use it to honour God?"
In coming home this weekend, we were reminded about how fragile life is and that our time on Earth is finite. My husband's mom had signs of an oncoming heart attack while we were out of town, which she admitted and for which I believe is a result of her being overstressed and anxious. I cannot help but believe Satan had a hand in this. Satan has been revelling on his grip on him until recently and I don't believe in coincidences. My husband's desire to walk along side Christ is a threat... for when push comes to shove, my man is loyal and devoted, who would not want a servant like that?
My husband was distraught when he realized what went "down" while we were connecting with God. He became so emotional at the hospital during his visit with Mom that he started crying, something he rarely does. He began to envision his life without Mom and was thankful that God had preserved her and that she is currently in no serious condition.
But now I am reminded that we need to show and tell others about God's goodness before it really becomes too late. We are to share God's desire for us to be in Heaven with Him and that we are to obey His teachings... especially sharing the Good News with the ones we say we love the most!
Father, I pray that you will continue to work in me to be more generous, loving, sincere, faithful and trusting in you. Help me to remember that when You are with me, Satan doesn't stand a chance...
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Remembering God
Today's sermon really got to me. My last post was 2 months ago. I slipped back into my "old coat"... leaving God to the wayside, when he should be at the forefront. I haven't been praying as regularly. I know God is calling me. It's time to get back...Thank you for the reminder of how unworthy I am, but despite all my flaws, you love me just the same. All you ask, is that I let you show through my actions...
I love you, God!
I love you, God!
Monday, March 19, 2012
My New Submersion in the Word
Today's passage is from Luke 7:37-38. It's about how Jesus could forgive and associate himself with a prostitute. This prostitute had so much faith that she washed Jesus' feet with her tears and a bottle of expensive perfume. She even kissed his feet. She did all this because she loved Christ.
the Pharisees claimed that Jesus couldn't be the Son of God, as God would never love a sinner, especially a prostititute. Christ says, " Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven- for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.." (Luke 7:47).
I am attending the "Becoming a Contagious Christian" course and am in the process of creating my story to share with others to make them understand how God is working in my life and changing me, making me a far better person...
the Pharisees claimed that Jesus couldn't be the Son of God, as God would never love a sinner, especially a prostititute. Christ says, " Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven- for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.." (Luke 7:47).
I am attending the "Becoming a Contagious Christian" course and am in the process of creating my story to share with others to make them understand how God is working in my life and changing me, making me a far better person...
Monday, March 5, 2012
Taking a Stand for Public Education
I'm sorry, but this won't be a scripture reflection today... for I need prayer for a calmer heart...
I'm feeling rather remissed by the whole strike action teachers have to take... I have seen first hand what the government's cost saving measures have turned our education system into... a mess. Over the course of the 10 years I have been teaching, I have moved from being a proud professional to one who is overworked and at times overwhelmed and discouraged by the types of children I have to teach on a daily basis. I am a perfectionist and spend countless hours outside of class time thinking of ways to make things work - to make lessons come alive and to engage all my learners in one single lesson.
But every year, I am faced with a new challenge... more special needs kids... more kids who can't get a ministry designation because we don't have staff to perform the necessary tests in a timely fashion. It doesn't matter that I have 4 identified kids, plus 1 more that will be given a designation before the end of the year - one that I have been pushing to get identified nearly 1.5 years ago, not to mention the 2 others that I have who are slow learners with written output issues that I know will not be identified any time soon. It doesn't make a difference to the government that I have a class of 10 out of 30 students who have learning needs... this figure doesn't seem far fetched as I can easily have 10 out of 30 fail and 10 out 30 ace the same math test. Please tell me, how does this make teaching easy?
I look back to my class just 5 years ago... I covered so much more curricular material at a more in depth level... I can't do that anymore... for if I did, nearly half of my class would fail. Because of the needs in the class, with no extra support, I have had to cover material at a much slower pace. 5 years ago I "only" had 3 kids with learning disabilities...
People are under the impression that it is not only the children with special needs that are affected, but the whole class is affected... As a result these children, as a group, have been "dumbed" down. They pass on each year, "dumbed" down a little more each time. By the time they reach middle school and secondary school, the damage has been done... As classroom teachers spend more time working with the students with learning needs, we neglect the rest of the others. How is this equitable? It is not... the system has failed and teachers are left picking up the pieces making it work.
I have analogy for the state our education system. The public can't see how bad things are because teachers have done such a great cover up job...I think of it as ER doctors who have to take on more and more high risk and high needs patients to a point where it is impossible to see all the patients they need to. In fact they would have to give up their lunch hour, work through their break and even stay later without pay... why would they do this? Because the system is broken and if they didn't do this, they wouldn't be able to live with their decision to turn their back on someone in need... Not only do they give up what ever time they have, but they are asked to take on additional challenges, like taking on tasks that require specialists... That's what our government has done... they have taken away our specialists and asked the remaining generalists to carry the load... what is their plan? To throw in a few eduation assistants... wow...
Some people argue, telling us to stop doing all the extras, let the system crumble. But who will suffer? The children, who never asked to be victims of this cost saving measure. As someone who preaches doing the right thing, how can I stand back and not save whoever I can?
The government talks about teaching to the future... individualized learning plans for every student... wow... don't you think that's what most teacher do anyways... but now the government wants to coind this phrase and add a paperwork component to it with out giving us support and provisions to make this work... we can't even keep up as it is, how can they expect anymore. I have nothing more to give... what do they want? My first born child? My life? I find it hurtful when people complain about teachers, when they haven't even walked into our classrooms... when they can't even remember their child's teacher's name... that's sad... it's disrespectful... That's right, I'm not a day care provider for your child while you at work. I'm attempting to mould your child so he or she can have a brighter future...
So I pray that the public and our government officials can open their eyes to see we have a system that needs saving. Money needs to go into fund education. All that you have taken out this past decade needs to be fixed.
I'm feeling rather remissed by the whole strike action teachers have to take... I have seen first hand what the government's cost saving measures have turned our education system into... a mess. Over the course of the 10 years I have been teaching, I have moved from being a proud professional to one who is overworked and at times overwhelmed and discouraged by the types of children I have to teach on a daily basis. I am a perfectionist and spend countless hours outside of class time thinking of ways to make things work - to make lessons come alive and to engage all my learners in one single lesson.
But every year, I am faced with a new challenge... more special needs kids... more kids who can't get a ministry designation because we don't have staff to perform the necessary tests in a timely fashion. It doesn't matter that I have 4 identified kids, plus 1 more that will be given a designation before the end of the year - one that I have been pushing to get identified nearly 1.5 years ago, not to mention the 2 others that I have who are slow learners with written output issues that I know will not be identified any time soon. It doesn't make a difference to the government that I have a class of 10 out of 30 students who have learning needs... this figure doesn't seem far fetched as I can easily have 10 out of 30 fail and 10 out 30 ace the same math test. Please tell me, how does this make teaching easy?
I look back to my class just 5 years ago... I covered so much more curricular material at a more in depth level... I can't do that anymore... for if I did, nearly half of my class would fail. Because of the needs in the class, with no extra support, I have had to cover material at a much slower pace. 5 years ago I "only" had 3 kids with learning disabilities...
People are under the impression that it is not only the children with special needs that are affected, but the whole class is affected... As a result these children, as a group, have been "dumbed" down. They pass on each year, "dumbed" down a little more each time. By the time they reach middle school and secondary school, the damage has been done... As classroom teachers spend more time working with the students with learning needs, we neglect the rest of the others. How is this equitable? It is not... the system has failed and teachers are left picking up the pieces making it work.
I have analogy for the state our education system. The public can't see how bad things are because teachers have done such a great cover up job...I think of it as ER doctors who have to take on more and more high risk and high needs patients to a point where it is impossible to see all the patients they need to. In fact they would have to give up their lunch hour, work through their break and even stay later without pay... why would they do this? Because the system is broken and if they didn't do this, they wouldn't be able to live with their decision to turn their back on someone in need... Not only do they give up what ever time they have, but they are asked to take on additional challenges, like taking on tasks that require specialists... That's what our government has done... they have taken away our specialists and asked the remaining generalists to carry the load... what is their plan? To throw in a few eduation assistants... wow...
Some people argue, telling us to stop doing all the extras, let the system crumble. But who will suffer? The children, who never asked to be victims of this cost saving measure. As someone who preaches doing the right thing, how can I stand back and not save whoever I can?
The government talks about teaching to the future... individualized learning plans for every student... wow... don't you think that's what most teacher do anyways... but now the government wants to coind this phrase and add a paperwork component to it with out giving us support and provisions to make this work... we can't even keep up as it is, how can they expect anymore. I have nothing more to give... what do they want? My first born child? My life? I find it hurtful when people complain about teachers, when they haven't even walked into our classrooms... when they can't even remember their child's teacher's name... that's sad... it's disrespectful... That's right, I'm not a day care provider for your child while you at work. I'm attempting to mould your child so he or she can have a brighter future...
So I pray that the public and our government officials can open their eyes to see we have a system that needs saving. Money needs to go into fund education. All that you have taken out this past decade needs to be fixed.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Getting Back...
It's been rather odd since it has been nearly 2 weeks since my last post. I feel a little disconnected, especially with all the things happening at work.
Matthew 24:32-51
Jesus Fortells the Future
The Son of Man will come without warning and take us with him to live with God. I do wonder when this day will come.
1 Corinthians 4:1-21
Paul and the Corinthians
All we have is from God, so why boast about it.
The kingdom of God is not just fancy talk, it is living by God's power.
Matthew 24:32-51
Jesus Fortells the Future
The Son of Man will come without warning and take us with him to live with God. I do wonder when this day will come.
1 Corinthians 4:1-21
Paul and the Corinthians
All we have is from God, so why boast about it.
The kingdom of God is not just fancy talk, it is living by God's power.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
How can I stop my materialistic desires....
I'm still trying to figure out my "groove" and rhythm. I am slowly gaining more energy to last through the work weak. Lately, it has been difficult to stay focussed and energized. I have to pray and ask you, Father for more strength and wisdom and remember that you are at the heart of my teachings. I pray Father, that you will allow me to follow in Christ's foot steps and teach with the same passion, heart and soul. We started to looking at some open houses this weekend just so we had an idea of what we could "afford" if we wanted to move. I'm a little torn... what we have now is great and more than what we need, but there is always this desire of mine to "upgrade"... yes... my materialist nature...
Matthew 19:16-30
The Young Rich Man
This is the perfect passage for me... Thanks God. In this passage a rich man asks Jesus how he can enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Jesus tells him to follow and obey all 10 commandments. The rich man told Jesus he has followed and obeyed all commandments, how else could he please God. To this Jesus told him to sell all his materialistic possessions, give the money to the poor and follow him, become one of Jesus' disciples. To this, the rich man bowed his head in shame, for this was something he was unable to give up... I can see myself reacting the same way as this rich man. I could see myself selling off some of my possessions, but to sell all and take up the cross, leaving everything behind... that's scary... but that would be living entirely on God's will...
Romans 16:17-27
Paul's Final Instructions
Paul asks us to steer clear of those who cause divisions and upset people's faiths. From our sermon today, our Pastor tells us that is our duty, to bring our lost brothers and sisters home, home to God through the love of Jesus Christ.
Matthew 19:16-30
The Young Rich Man
This is the perfect passage for me... Thanks God. In this passage a rich man asks Jesus how he can enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Jesus tells him to follow and obey all 10 commandments. The rich man told Jesus he has followed and obeyed all commandments, how else could he please God. To this Jesus told him to sell all his materialistic possessions, give the money to the poor and follow him, become one of Jesus' disciples. To this, the rich man bowed his head in shame, for this was something he was unable to give up... I can see myself reacting the same way as this rich man. I could see myself selling off some of my possessions, but to sell all and take up the cross, leaving everything behind... that's scary... but that would be living entirely on God's will...
Romans 16:17-27
Paul's Final Instructions
Paul asks us to steer clear of those who cause divisions and upset people's faiths. From our sermon today, our Pastor tells us that is our duty, to bring our lost brothers and sisters home, home to God through the love of Jesus Christ.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)